In this interview series, we’ll be talking to experts about how to keep your New Year’s resolutions. We’ll find out what works and what doesn’t, and get some tips on how to make sure you stick to your goals in the new year.
Micheal OBrien
Title: Chief Breath Officer
Company: Pause Breathe Reflect
Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/michaelobrienpelotoncoaching
#1 — Small Ripples Lead to Big Waves: Have a big goal, but start with small steps with daily consistency. If you want to develop a twenty-minute daily mindfulness practice, begin with one-minute meditations and lengthen them as you strengthen your habit. Most New Year’s resolutions fail because we make too big of a leap too quickly.
#2 — Get an Encouragement Buddy: Find a friend you also want to develop a meditation practice and encourage each other as you build your habit.
Paige Arnof-Fenn
Title: Founder & CEO
Company: Mavens & Moguls
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paigearnoffenn
In the best of times entrepreneurs and SMBs are positive and optimistic and tend to bite off more than we can chew setting big goals and resolutions that can be hard to reach. Covid has hit every part of the economy hard but small businesses based on discretionary spending and a tight community the hardest. For me committing my resolutions to writing is critical and has helped me hit personal and professional milestones and knock things off my to do list over the years. Out of sight out of mind. Goals can change or morph over time but I respond well to having clear goals I want to achieve with the time I have. Call me old fashioned but I am a big believer in lists and sticky notes. The simple act of writing things down makes them real to me. I love crossing things off my to do lists, it is a great sense of progress and accomplishment. I find it hard to ignore notes on the bathroom mirror or computer screen every day.
Find a system that works for you. Whether you prefer using your phone as a reminder or a tickler file, a coach or a buddy system, an online tool or pen and paper just create accountability that you will respond to effectively. Creating SMART goals eliminates generalities/guesswork, sets a clear timeline, makes it easier to track progress and identify missed milestones. Commit them to writing and set time to review regularly, celebrate wins along the way and recognize smaller wins/milestones to keep you moving forward. For ongoing work I tend to set realistic goals I know are a stretch but motivating and for new activities I tend to push the limit and set them higher since we are on unchartered territory. When the stars align with a little luck resolutions become achievements.
Melanie Jordan
Title: Nationally Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach, NBC-HWC
Company: Your Healthy Life Made Easy LLC
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melanierjordan/
Make resolutions and positive changes when it’s right for you, but not solely because the calendar says so. If you’re ready because it’s New Year’s, go for it, but start with something small that feels doable.
When New Year’s rolls around, many feel the social pressure that “everyone” is making resolutions, so they assume that they too must choose to make changes.
Overall, according to the Transtheoretical Model in psychology which shows that changes to behavior happen in distinct stages, people are going to be most successful in making lasting changes when they hit the stage called “preparation.” That’s the stage when they are ready, willing and able to make a change, start planning and taking small steps towards implementing that change and believe they are going to be successful. To choose to embark upon a change with an artificial start date that isn’t in alignment with one’s own readiness can make it much harder to be successful.
That said, if you are truly in that place where you feel committed to change because it aligns with you personally vs. the calendar, then you just may benefit from the natural “group support” that you can leverage from others who are in it to win it in the new year.
Over the years, in coaching clients and in my own personal life, I’ve been successful with choosing just one small thing I wanted to improve upon or accomplish in the New Year that I felt I could commit to, versus large sweeping changes or goals that didn’t feel achievable.
For example, last year I resolved to get more “me time” in, and started with being intentional about taking my lunch break and doing something active at least three out of five weekdays. I didn’t pressure myself to do something active every day at lunchtime necessarily, nor did I force myself to choose what activity I would do. My only goal was to check that box with movement be it walking, lifting weights, using my hula hoop, doing kickboxing or Zumba. It worked like a charm because I was ready, willing and able to take this on, and it gave me some quick early wins under my belt that gave me the belief that I could keep this habit going.
Dr. Benjamin Gibson
Title: Founder. Pharmacist. Speaker. Coach.
Company: Awesome We Can Do It Better Together
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drbenjamingibson
Only 2 in 10 Americans are able to keep new habits after one month of trying. Want to be a statistic? No. So what can you do? Maybe you want to fast occasionally like I did. That is how I lost 22 pounds of excess weight.
Here is the first secret. No alcohol. That is a major calorie reduction. Don’t freak out. There are other foods you can chew and swallow to be healthy without wine. Children do it all the time. They don’t even care about wine. They are blissfully ignorant.
First, I was very specific about what I wanted to do. For instance, if I wanted to fast, I would choose a meal where I could opt out. I would not just dawdle and say I will skip lunch today or dinner now.
Then I made sure it was measurable. Granted skipping one meal is easily measurable. You know that you aren’t eating because your body initially starts to growl at you. It does this because it is expecting your behavior yesterday to be the same as your behavior today. This is the opposite of habit changing. So what do you do? You drink some water. You get up and move around for a short time. You wrote in a journal: I feel hungry. Change is hard, but it is achievable. Yay for change. Yay for me. Today is Day 1,2,3,4….etc of my habit.
You also make sure that it is achievable. So let’s say you have always eaten every 2 hours. Your physician thinks that you can change that. You have a plan how you can extend that every 2 hour window to 2 hours 10 minutes. Then you increase the time to 3 hours or 4 hours or even 5 hours. It is achievable.
You have to make it relevant to you. So in the example of fasting, its relevance is that food has calories. Food is a source of stored energy. If you are constantly eating, you are constantly increasing the amount of calories you have. So you would have to spend a lot of energy to use that stored energy.
Lastly, it has to have a deadline. At some point in time your goal should be met. So for instance maybe you see your doctor twice a year. You might want to have a 3 month goal to see how you have increased your fasting. The accountability will be in that 6 month time between visits. Then you can know how much you have improved.
How can you fail? Give up. Do not try again ever. Say you failed. How can you do better next time?
Human beings make mistakes. If you view it as an opportunity to learn how not to do something that is not as painful. Give yourself permission to fail.
Nicole Fevrier Davis
Title: NASM Certified Personal Trainer, Behavior Specialist, Metabolic Technician, Medical Intuitive
Company: MindBody Mastery LLC
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-fevrier-davis-00245623/
Whether you are looking to lose weight, run a marathon, or begin practices to reduce your daily stress you will need to change your behavior to support your new thoughts of how you would like to be. Your future “you” and the creation of those new behaviors will depend on these three “Dos and Don’ts”
DON’T attempt to change anything superficially. Ask yourself what are your real intentions to attain this goal? If you want to lose twenty pounds to make your old boyfriend jealous, then that goal will be less compelling than if you wan to reduce your stress to get off high blood pressure medication. You want to find a goal that has enough intrinsic value to sustain over time. Likewise don’t look to supplements, new clothing, new equipment, or spend more time than is necessary on a scale or in front of a mirror.
DO meditate and pray on your goals. Very often we think we need one thing and find we are actually looking for something else when we allow ourselves to get quiet in meditation on that goal. For instance, you want to lose weight to make your old boyfriend jealous, when in fact, you discover in meditation that what you really want is to be loved by someone you can trust.
DON’T make any super dramatic changes to attain your goals. Your limbic brain and amygdala have just experienced an over dose of of stress getting ready for the holiday. In order for lasting changes to take place you will have to quiet the limbic brain and help it feel safe first.
DO take time to rest and breathe through small changes that don’t threaten the limbic brain or amygdala. Try making one small and simple change at a time in recognition of your new priorities. Create a schedule to help you see your goals in small chunks instead of a singular overwhelming hurdle. For instance, running for five minutes on day one and working up to fifteen minutes by day twelve and a full two miles by the end of the month.
DON’T make any changes under duress. If you’ve just had a death in the family, gotten divorced, or moved it’s not likely you will be able to make any real progress toward your goals.
DO take a breather. It might be that your New Year’s Day is actually going to be more successful if you start April tenth. Give yourself time and energy to heal from whatever it is you are going through. Allow your soul, spirit and body to speak to you about their needs. You will never go wrong listening to them.
Sony Sherpa
Title: Holistic Doctor / Contributor at Nature’s Rise
Company: Nature’s Rise
Linkedin: N/A
The first thing you should do when it comes to new year’s resolutions is to set realistic goals. Often, we start full of motivation, only to give up halfway because our goals seem to be out of reach. Small, achievable goals will more likely keep you motivated and stick with your new year’s resolutions. Plus, these smaller goals add up over time to help you achieve bigger goals.
Another tip is to track and document your progress. To help you with this, your journal can be your safe space. Tracking your progress and recording your journey allows you to look back and see how far you’ve come. It can help fuel your motivation and maintain positive energy and attitude as you continue to work towards your goals. It also helps you identify areas for improvement and modifications, which can help set you up for success.
Lastly, don’t forget to reward yourself. Rewarding yourself for a goal achieved is an effective way to keep yourself motivated. When following a routine to attain or maintain a goal, it’s normal to feel discouraged. Creating a reward system can give you something to look forward to when you lack motivation and inspiration.
Trysta L Barwig
Title: Travel Expert and Project Manager
Company: This Travel Dream LLC
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tluhanga1
These are tips I use to help me keep my new year’s resolutions:
Make it specific: Your resolution should be measurable rather than vague, like “be healthier” or “improve my life.” Specific goals are more likely achievable because they give you a concrete direction to work towards. Try setting smaller goals related to the overall resolution, making them more achievable and ensuring you stay on track. For example, if your goal is to “be healthier,” break it down into achievable goals such as eating a balanced diet and exercising for thirty minutes three times a week.
Make it realistic: While having lofty goals is important, remember to keep them in the realm of what is achievable. Consider how much time and effort you can dedicate to your resolution and keep it manageable. It is essential to challenge yourself, but not so much that achieving the goal seems impossible. For example, I can only spend eight hours a week at the gym, so I need to set realistic goals that do not include going to the gym every day for two hours.
Establish a timeline: Set specific deadlines so that you can measure your progress and have something to work towards. This will give you the incentive to keep going even when it gets tough! Even if you make small changes daily, they will add up, and you’ll be closer to achieving your goal in no time.
Track your progress: Knowing how far you’ve come is essential for keeping yourself accountable and motivated. Keeping a journal or diary of your progress can keep you on track and remind you how much you’ve accomplished.
Reward yourself: Celebrate your successes along the way! When you reach a milestone, reward yourself for your hard work. This can be anything from taking a break to indulging in something special like a massage or dinner out — make sure it doesn’t contradict your ultimate goal.
Trevor Sookraj
Title: CEO
Company: Divisional
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/divisional/
Personally, I have found that the best way for me to keep my resolutions is through accountability. When I make my resolutions I don’t just keep them to myself — I tell a few friends and family members. Doing this provides healthy accountability that motivates me to actually go after the goals I’ve set for myself because I want them to see me succeed.
James Green
Title: Owner
Company: Cardboard Cutouts
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jamesgreen/
The key to sticking with your New Year’s resolution is to start before the end of the previous year. If your goal for 2023 is to start exercising more, then start tomorrow. Today, even. You’re giving yourself more time to get in the habit of whatever your resolution is before you feel the pressure of having to actually keep it. Once the new year arrives, you’ll already be in the habit and it will be much easier to stick with it for the remainder of the year.
Jared Heathman
Title: M.D.
Company: Your Family Psychiatrist
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jared-heathman-3590b6100/
The new year is an exciting time to implement changes into your daily life. Many individuals set a new year’s resolution with a goal to change some aspect of their life. Some tips to keep your new year’s resolution include having an accountability partner, creating a routine, and being realistic. Having an accountability partner does not mean the individual must share the same goal, but they should be a person of support for you and your goal. An accountability partner can encourage you to continue making a change even when you may feel discouraged. Creating a routine can help individuals with time management. Plan ahead on how you will implement the change you desire. For example, if one would like to exercise more, creating a routine can aid in identifying when one is able to exercise. Being realistic is important to set yourself up for success. Try to create change that is sustainable. When considering implementing a change, self-reflect on what it will take to accomplish this change. The new year holds many opportunities. Take this time to plan ahead and be realistic with yourself on what you would like to accomplish within the next year.
Erika Beeson
Title: CEO, Author, Coach, Speaker
Company: Pivoting Your Potential, LLC
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/erika-beeson-695a0619/
The tradition or norm of creating New Year’s Resolutions has a very inspirational foundation. The purpose is to start the New Year with a clean slate, with renewed mindsets and the adoption of habits that will help you reach specific goals or will support a new path you might desire to follow. The inspiration is there, the desire for change is there, but often times people just can’t stick to their resolutions. There is actually a joke at the gym I go to where most of the regulars will actually avoid the gym for the first 2–3 weeks of the year until the crowd of “Resolutioners” drop off. It’s a stigma tied closely to resolutions that it’s pretty rare for people to actually stick to them long term, but why is that?
After years of my own personal shortcomings in keeping my resolutions and my experiences in coaching others I’ve come to some interesting insights about resolutions, transformations and goals in general.
People set themselves up for failure right out of the gate when they create these lists with 5, 6, 10, 15 different New Years Resolutions they want to incorporate come January 1st. I want you to think of your day to day right now and imagine tomorrow morning waking up and immediately adding 15 other things into your day. Not enough time or energy, right? You can’t just wake up one morning with the ability to adopt a whole new list of habits or a whole new mindset. It’s not a switch you can flip to suddenly have the capacity to do all these other things. You would be adding too many blocks to the tower all at once and I can guarantee your tower will topple quickly. I personally used to do this. I wanted to change so many things about what I was doing and how I was living I was so determined to change it all but the massive overhaul I was trying to put into effect in my life ended up backfiring on me and I’d just throw in the towel pretty quickly.
So, what’s the secret sauce to be able to keep your resolutions? First and foremost, get focused and intentional about what change you truly desire. Don’t put things on your list you think you should, put down the resolutions you actually really want to go after. This will help you to keep your list of resolutions shorter but more potent. Once you have your list of resolutions, there are two methods I suggest.
Method 1: You need to look at each resolution not as a single action or task but a progression. Sometimes you’ll hear people refer to this concept as reverse engineering the goal, but the purpose is to look at your resolution and then break it down into bite size pieces. Each bite size piece is a building block that will set the foundation for success in reaching the main goal. Let me set an example for you based upon the #1 most popular resolution of all time — getting in shape/losing weight. If your resolution is to “Get in shape in 2023” then let’s break it down. What do you need to do to get into shape? Workout and eat right. Pretty vague guidelines so far and those two things aren’t measurable and they are not specific enough. Let’s keep breaking it down just on the workout side. If working out in the morning is best for your schedule, then you’ll need wake up early enough to make that happen. If you like an hour-long workout, I suggest starting with simply waking up 15 mins earlier than usual and just stretching or getting into a few simple yoga poses or maybe just knock out some abs in your pajamas just there in your room. This is a simple goal, easily attainable. Then after about 7–10 days of that, set your alarm for 30 mins earlier than usual and get into your workout clothes, do some at home exercises and progress the habit. After a week or so of this level, take it up a notch move to 45 mins or go right to waking up an hour earlier and get in a full workout at home or hit the gym.
There are obviously more aspects we could break down here, but you get the idea. By using this method, you are setting yourself up for success. Waking up 10 mins early is easy — you are getting quick wins and reminding yourself that yes, you can do this. The most important thing you can do for your self-esteem is to keep your promises to yourself — and if you miss a day — don’t beat yourself up. Just never miss two days in a row — get right back after it. I use this exact method when I had a resolution/goal to incorporate meditation into my daily routine. I did not do well just sitting still and the through of sitting there with my thoughts and breath for 30 mins a day sounded painstakingly impossible. I broke it down and started with 10 mins a day and now a year later, 30 mins is a piece of cake for me and I actually look forward to it.
Method 2: I’ve seen it time after time, people get these lists of all their resolutions and on Jan 1st it’s like opening the flood gates! Some people have so many resolutions, they nearly can’t keep track of them all. This leads to overwhelm and in more cases than not people will give up on the whole. No one ever said that all of your resolutions had to all start on January 1st. This is why I love to recommend the method of staggering. If you have five resolutions on your list, start one on January 1st, start the next on January 15th, then the next on February 15th etc. It doesn’t have to be a set timeline and depending on how involved each resolution is, that might determine how long you give yourself to master that new habit before trying to take on another one. You have to learn to walk before you can run, master one new habit at a time and you’ll experience a much greater level of success.
Keeping a New Year’s resolution doesn’t mean you accomplished it all 365 days of the year. Remember why you are making these resolutions to begin with. It’s not just to check off a box on a list, right? You are truly desiring change, improvement and growth and it’s really more about the journey. These two methods will not only help you actually keep your New Year’s resolutions, but I will set you up for success long term and in my opinion help you to truly immerse yourself in the beauty of the journey towards true and long-lasting change. Cheers to 2023!
Emma Kozlowski
Title: Founder of Eighteen Summers
Company: Eighteen Summers
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emma-kozlowski-72a99a105/
The most helpful strategy for me is to set my resolution action into my pre-existing routine. For example, last year I set a goal to write in my journal every day. Rather than just putting my journal next to my night stand and hoping I remember to write in it, I put it into my routine. My routine was always to brush my teeth and then read in bed. I decided to always write in my journal after I brushed my teeth and before I began to read.
This is helpful for me when starting any new continual habit. I also set a small goal to start of writing in my journal for the month of January. Once I was able to accomplish that small goal, I felt successful and felt confident that I could continue to journal for a longer period of time.
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